Family and CODs

It is a day of pouring rain. It is coming down so hard that you can hear it on the roof. Granted, the roof is metal, new in the last 6 months, but there is a small attic space between us and the roof. Pounding rain, and I contemplate the change in the house hold. We have had a visiting daughter and her dog. It was pleasant and warm with all of us here. Two dogs skirted each other carefully, but really were OK with the arrangements. The cat hissed when close to the new dog, looking a bit like a lion in miniature. There was laughter, and intense silence as daughter did her research, grading, and teaching on line. And she did a lot of driving exploring the surrounding territory filling us in with what she found. When we moved the towels out of the bathroom she used, it rang with the silence. It echoed. Frogs spent time in that bathroom waiting for the trip back home. I heard them burble a few times.

I thought about how older humans seem to need to move from home and go somewhere they have read about, sunshine, sand, townhouses filled with their kind and age. But I really think that is probably a mistake. I bet they really end up feeling lost and alone, and like what do I do now. And then there are usually masses of people, parading around, pushing you aside in grocery stores because they have to pee, but need to pay for their purchase. And they end up walking but not seeing where they are.

If you stay where you are familiar with the terrain, the weather, the services, and perhaps some of the people you know that are still living in the area, than you continue with your life, and it may just seem longer! To have a daughter filling the spaces with laughter and helping you chatter about things, makes you realize what empty can be when she leaves. So heed the decisions that can be made about what you do as you age. Stay where you can welcome the family and know where you are walking or riding. And perhaps the daughter, or the son, or the other daughter will come and visit. Well, really, she knows where you live. And the cat will adjust once again! And all the other kids might come and visit as well! Being old is liking your space if it remains the one you remember.

I still hear the rain, but the cat came in and is napping.